Saturday, March 14, 2009

1989

...kids... I used to think of them. Just a bunch of pple with such short thinking and narrow mindsets.

all just a bunch of kids I'm with...
yet, I've grown to actually like them- from my lil buddy and bro whom I actually cared and loved so much in bmt, to my fellow colleagues now in my branch. It's even amazing that out of us 4 specs, 3 are Christian... maybe He wanted to get me back on track, it was all going wrong.

for sure, army will bring out the worse in a person's character, and I've seen the worse in some, and they've prob also seen me bad. Christians fall, there aren't any saints. But at the end of the day, I hope I can grow to love the person more, and understand that it's the system that forces one to act in a way they would not usually act.

I've got a great boss.

one of them had asked me before- don't you feel childish being among us? They see the degree as the separation point- you've been there done that. what else is there to achieve?
what else?
relationships.

maybe... just maybe, I may get something very valuable out of this stupid army time.
I may get friends, and people I actually know and love.

and no, I actually don't feel childish being amongst you all.
and, I actually find the wrestles, tussles, tau poks and fights in the office quite... exhilarating
and, finally, it's all good
cos I look your age too :)

But this is a place where I feel so far away. I can't deny that.
I've realised, that I'm not the knight, or zealot that I wished I was, or painted myself to be.
See, I've learnt. ;)